I tried to resist: really. All fall, as I stood sentry in the lobbies of the Newhouse and the Beaumont, I was sure that my notebook would fill with remarks overheard from audiences about Macbeth. And while I did capture a few ear-popping comments about the Scottish play - one woman insisted she had seen a TV version of it starring Jerry Seinfeld - I was more often drawn back to what I scribbled down about Domesticated. To wit: 

Woman in Fur Coat: Clybourne Park was a follow-up to A Raisin in the Sun. Is this play a sequel to Clybourne Park

Second Woman: Yes, I think it is. 

Woman in Fur Coat: Oh, good. I like trilogies. 

* * * 

Young Woman: I once heard Jeff Goldblum play piano in a jazz club. 

Her Friend: How was he? 

Young Woman: Really good. He could have had a career in musicals if he wanted. 

Her Friend: I thought tonight was a musical. 

Young Woman: You thought tonight was a musical? You thought a show calledDomesticated was a musical? 

Her Friend: If there's a musical called Urinetown, there can be a one calledDomesticated

* * * 

Elderly Man: Is there nudity in this play? I hope there isn't nudity in this play. 

Elderly Woman: No, there isn't nudity. Whenever there's nudity, they have a sign that says: "Nudity in this play." 

Elderly Man: No, they don't. They have signs that say, "There are gunshots in this production." "There is smoking in this production." "There are strobe lights in this production." 

Elderly Woman: They have to have warnings about those things. All of those things can cause strokes. 

Elderly Man: When I took my mother to Hair in the sixties, the nudity almost gave her a heart attack. 

* * * 

Distinguished-looking Man: Why are you late? I almost had to go in without you. 

Woman: It's snowing. 

Distinguished Man: That's no excuse. 

Woman: My dog took too long to do his business. 

Distinguished Man: That's no excuse. 

Woman: I just saw George Clooney on the street and I followed him for a block. 

Distinguished Man: Okay, that's an excuse. 

* * * 

Woman at Intermission: This play reminds me of "The Good Wife." 

Second Woman: Is that the one with Nathan Lane and Christine Baranski? 

Woman: Yes. 

Second Woman: Are they the stars of it? 

Woman: The Broadway version. 

* * * 

Man: A friend of mine told me this play is very politically incorrect. 

Second Man: Good. I'm getting tired of going to the theater and seeing liberals getting off and conservatives getting ridiculed. 

Man: So it's only politically incorrect when conservatives win? What's it called when liberals win? 

Second Man: MSNBC. 

* * * 

First Woman: When I heard that Laurie Metcalf was in this show I just had to buy tickets. 

Second Woman: I've liked her ever since "Roseanne." 

Third Woman: I've liked her ever since Balm in Gilead

First Woman: I've liked her ever since the third-grade Thanksgiving pageant she did in her hometown in Illinois. 

Second Woman: How would you know? You grew up in Brooklyn. 

First Woman: YouTube. 

Brendan Lemon is the American theater critic for the Financial Times and the editor of lemonwade.com